What's up ya'll? I'm in serious need of some advice. I just went back through my recent posts to link to when I first shared my recent health issues, but I can't find it. So apparently I never told you anyway. I'm shocked considering how on top of things I've been lately (no really, not at all). Alas, here it is.
About a month ago now I experienced a really
weird sensation as I was literally sitting in a meeting at work. Weird head pains, cold spreading through my body, numbness and tingling... you know the usual. I left the meeting, called my mom & we went to acute care. They tested me for signs of a stroke, which were normal, obviously, and scheduled a CT scan. Without getting into the nitty-gritty, we had some bad experiences with acute care from the moment we walked in the door until a few days later when they had scheduled the wrong procedure for me. So, we decided that going to see a neurologist and getting testing done via them would be the best route. And we did, waited a couple weeks for the appointment, meanwhile these instances of sharp, stabbing pains continued many, many times a day. Met with the neurologist, talked him through the symptoms and an exam, then scheduled blood work, a brain MRI, and an echocardiogram (to rule out some pre-existing heart problems). And so a lovely Tuesday morning was spent hungry (because I had to fast), being admitted to the hospital, and having panic attacks in the MRI machine. Oh and then going to work for the afternoon... blech. But we made it through it (mostly with the help of that hot ham 'n cheese mom) and waited for the results......
Now we're up to last week, our follow-up appointment with the neurologist and test results. Brain MRI was normal. Echocardiagram was normal. WONDERFUL NEWS. Blood work had a couple of weird things that we will watch, but in general was good. Neurologist diagnoses me with a reallylongdoctorstermthaticantremember, lamens term: jabs & jolts syndrome (yep that's sure what it feels like). It is basically a form of migraine, unrelated to the regular ones that I get, that effects you everyday, several times a day, in the form of a jabbing, stabbing pain all over your head. Definitely bells ringing here. And so, he sent me off with a prescription and a follow-up appointment next week. I'm on day 4 of the medicine right now and still no change, and in fact some pretty bad pains at that. But I'm biding my time and crossing my fingers that it will begin to work.
However, all of this ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ has not done wonders for my stress level/anxiety/panic attacks. These problems, combined with some scary new stuff at work, has led me to have TWO panic attacks so far this month. For someone who used to suffer from them regularly (this is scary stuff folks) and kicked them to the curb back in September, this is very frightening to me. I actually woke Brian up in the middle of the night earlier this week to make sure he knew how to give me CPR. Because I could. not. breathe.
And so. Here I am. Explaining all of this because yes, I want you to be aware, but because I need your help. I am a very high-strung person and I know this about myself, but I can't live like this anymore. The panic attacks have GOT TO GO and I would like to be more relaxed in general. I have really been working hard on this and the fact that it hasn't done me any good so far is so discouraging. I need some new ideas. I know a lot of people deal with this sort of thing and I would love some encouraging words, methods, ideas, thoughts that you have. I am going to try to incorporate some yoga and breathing strategies into my life and hoping that that will help, at the very least, in the midst of a panic attack to help me to breathe. But I would like to begin changing my lifestyle altogether to prevent all of this. But I am honestly at a loss. I research this all of the time and nothing that I can find seems to be working for me.
But as for right now. I am drained. And I am off to relax with a book and a candle and a cup of tea. Now if that doesn't sound relaxing I don't know what does.
Xo.
Chelsea
Also, listen to
this song.
